As a coach working one-on-one with business leaders, I’ve seen firsthand how profoundly listening can impact personal and professional growth.
As Marion Franklin says in her book The Heart of Laser Focused Coaching, “a masterful coach learns to listen in a deeper way”.
Listening authentically with empathy is key. It means making eye contact, restating what’s said to check understanding, asking open questions to draw more out, being aware of non-verbals, and periodically summarizing discussions. For leaders, having someone who invests fully in comprehending their perspective can itself be transformative. It encourages vulnerability and builds self-awareness from a place of care, not criticism.
The benefits of this approach are clear. Leaders gain crucial insights, feel heard and motivated from within. Coaches obtain context to have wise, tailored discussions. And together, they can navigate challenges in a learning spirit.
The Art of Active Listening: A Coach’s Most Valuable Skill
What is Active Listening?
Active listening is a communication technique that requires full attention and understanding between parties. Unlike passive listening where the focus is internal thought rather than the speaker, active listening involves fully concentrating on what is being said while offering periodic verbal and non-verbal feedback cues.
Some key components of active listening include maintaining eye contact, reflecting back what was heard using paraphrasing, asking open-ended questions to draw out more details, noting body language and emotion, and summarizing discussions periodically. The goal is to make the other person feel truly listened to and understood rather than just waiting for your turn to speak.
For coaches, active listening goes a step further by adding an empathetic lens. Coaches identify with a leader’s perspective and circumstance while maintaining objective neutrality. This allows for tactful follow up that builds self-awareness instead of providing pat answers.
Examples From My Career
Early in my coaching career, clients were not truly opening up or developing insight on their own. A key turning point occurred when I shifted to listening without judgment during our sessions.
One client, a CEO struggling with an underperforming division, spent our first meeting venting frustrations without solutions. Rather than jumping in, I asked clarifying questions and offered reflection on what was shared. Over subsequent visits, through this supportive listening, the CEO discovered the real issues were a lack of stakeholder buy-in and misalignment on vision – realizations that led to successful course correction.
In another instance, an executive unwilling to accept negative feedback gradually revealed personal insecurities preventing growth. Listening without an agenda gave space to build self-awareness that empowered major leadership improvements recognized throughout the organization.
Another executive was hesitant to acknowledge weaknesses but listening attentively allowed uncomfortable truths to surface over time. Without an agenda to push, they found the self-knowledge and courage needed to strengthen their leadership. These experiences taught me that the most impactful coaching comes from providing a safe space for reflection, not advice-giving.
These examples show how focusing first on understanding through active listening creates an environment where clients can develop solutions on their own, leading to sustainable change managed internally rather than imposed externally.
Benefits of Active Listening for Leaders
Active listening confers several benefits for any executive seeking to enhance their leadership abilities through professional coaching:
- Develops Crucial Self-Awareness – Actively exploring thoughts and behaviors without judgement allows identifying blindspots and areas for improvement.
- Fosters Open Communication – Leaders know insights shared will be comprehended versus used prescriptively, encouraging vulnerability.
- Builds Empathy and Understanding – Translating experiences into the language of leadership cultivates soft skills just as critical for success.
- Facilitates Internal Motivation – Coming to realizations independently inspires ownership over any changes versus reactive compliance.
- Provides Context for Productive Discussion – Coaches obtain a holistic view of constraints and capabilities before advising tangible application.
- Cultivates a Growth Mindset – Accepting imperfection and continual reflection strengthens ability to adapt in VUCA environments.
- Models Inclusive Leadership – Actively listening signals approachability and values varying perspectives for strategic decision making.
The Heart of Coaching
As these insights show, active listening should be considered the cornerstone capability for any coach seeking to facilitate impactful growth. While technical knowledge and experience provide useful context, transformation ultimately happens internally through understanding and reflection and not externally through declarations.
Coaching is as much about providing a supportive space as it is offering perspectives. And the most impactful space is created through compassionate, non-judgmental and invested listening designed to draw out awareness versus insert assessment. For leaders navigating complex challenges, having someone who invests in completely comprehending their truth can be tremendously empowering.
Going forward, I believe any coach hoping to cultivate real change would be wise to lead with their ability to listen with empathy, patience and full presence of mind. It is an often subtle but profoundly powerful technique for Igniting self-driven progress aligned with an individual’s authentic needs, strengths and goals, actively listening lies at the heart of my own philosophy and approach as an executive coach.